MC Gatorade (assfingers) wrote,
MC Gatorade
assfingers

In the spirit of abmann's post about bag contents, it has been recommended to me to do the same.

of course I don't use a bag, I use my jacket. This makes for interesting times in the non-winter (read: "July") months here in Wisconsin, when it is all transferred to my pants pockets.

Now, this is the new jacket, so it's not all that interesting just yet. Former incarnations have included such objects as: vial of Alaskan crude, andamaroo's superball (eventually covered in said crude, oddly), a mini turkish-english dictionary (think about that), a first place extemp french ribbon that we later left as a tip for a bozo waiter at Irish Water (along with part of a shovel handle that I think chairtomorrow had in HIS jacket for whatever reason) along with a note that we signed "Dr. Bananas", assorted wrenches and screwdrivers that were never used for actually driving screws or wrenching, control_group's TYME card, my sister's harmonica that has been down chairtomorrow's pants, Dunham's Westgate cash register, gun case, & fitting room keys, and various little rubber dudes such as Tintin, Yakko, and a giant fake ice cube with a bug in it that I liked to chew on.

This jacket was referred to by most parties as a "Harpo jacket". Today's offering is much less interesting. Bullets indicate a different compartment:

  • Sunglasses case, complete with prescription sunglasses.
  • leather gloves.
  • Bus pass.
  • credit card, debit card, facstaff ID, UWW ID, Driver's License, Union ID card, cash room access card.
  • Work keys - office, mailbox, linen closet, storage closet, basement storeroom, my drawer, supervisor's drawer, co-worker's drawer, outside door key, and three other keys that probably open doors but who knows because no one ever told me where they go. These co on my Motion W carabeener.
  • normal keys - these are attached via 4 empty keychains and a Leinenkugel's oar. My car, bizarre's car, mom's house, my house, two chemistry lockers in WW from a class I dropped like 5 years ago, my bike lock keys (I don't have a bike lock anymore), mom's old house, our old family house, dad's house, dad's old apartment, and office H6/122 in the hospital. bizarre is a jerk and unhooked my old set of WW keys. I have one for every dorm at home, even though they went keyless three years ago. She told me that I was going to ruin my ignition or something because my keys weighed eleven pounds.
  • a checkbook, my new Ass Bank mortgage payment coupons book, two twenties, a single, and 11.32 in change - mostly dimes, for some reason.
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